Emiko Sumoto is a 17-year-old girl. Her nickname is Amy. She has long black straight hair down to her shoulders and almond-shaped eyes.
She lives with her parents, who came from Japan, in a middle-class house. She also has an older brother. His name is Hideo.
At her school there is a boy who likes her very much. He calles Adam and goes with Amy to the school dance. At this evening she is nervous because she is in love with Adam and likes to spend time with him. So she comes home late and her parents get angry. They say that Amy is not allowed to see Adam for a week. Amy is very sad about this but she says nothing against her parents. That shows that Amy respects her parents.
Ms Mettjes (20.2.11 16:46)
it's great that you started already!
In sum, the characterization is fine: Good structure, paragraphs, important information. However, you should have mentioned that Amy lives in the USA.
- Characterization (spelling!)
- He is called Adam (grammar)
- He goes to the school dance with Amy (syntax)
- "that evening" rather than "at this"
- they say that Amy will not be allowed... -> future tense
- "This shows" rather than "That"
See you tomorrow!